Podcasts & Audio

In Part I, Dr. Heitler introduces three examples of depression:

• Bonnie, frustrated with her inattentive husband
• Carl, unemployed and discouraged about finding a job
• Jack, down and out since his girlfriend left him

Part II examines what these cases have in common to explain that depression:

• May be triggered by a loss — Jack’s girlfriend, Carl’s job
• Centers around a conflict, either within yourself, between people, or with a situation
• Results from giving up on getting your concerns addressed

Part III focuses on techniques for breaking through the blues:

• Escaping from the submissive mode
• Visualizing to discover underlying concerns
• Focusing on positive solutions
• Giving up on control and thereby gaining power

Introduction to Anxiety as a Positive Force

• Understanding anxiety’s role in personal and emotional conflict
• Shifting perspectives: Viewing anxiety as an ally rather than an adversary

The Conflict-Based Theory of Anxiety

• Exploring the connection between awareness, conflict, and anxiety
• Identifying when anxiety arises and how to address the standstill it represents

Turning Anxiety Into Action

• Practical tools to use anxiety for problem-solving
• Strategies to clarify concerns and move toward resolution

Identifying Productive vs. Unproductive Anxiety

• Recognizing when anxiety helps versus when it hinders
• How to avoid the traps of worry, regret, and catastrophic thinking

Applications in Real Life

• Using anxiety as a tool for personal growth in scenarios such as decision-making, new challenges, and overcoming failures
• Case studies: Turning shyness, panic attacks, and agoraphobia into opportunities for self-awareness and action

Interactive Therapeutic Interviews

• Live demonstrations where participants explore anxiety through therapeutic techniques
• Real-world applications: Anxiety in career decisions, life transitions, and recovery from setbacks

1. Foundations of Conflict Resolution

   • Introduction to effective communication techniques
   • How to provide information without insult or escalation

2. Active Listening for Dialogue Progress

   • Techniques for listening that keep conversations productive and forward-moving
   • Strategies to express feelings in a non-hurtful way

3. Turning Conflict into Problem Solving

   • Clarifying initial positions
   • Exploring underlying concerns and motives
   • Choosing solutions that optimize for both partners

4. Addressing Escalated Conflicts

   • Tools to recognize when arguments have taken a negative turn
   • Methods for extricating from arguments and avoiding blame

5. Cleaning Up After Arguments

   • Techniques for managing the emotional “toxic spill” after a fight
   • Steps to prevent similar conflicts from recurring

6. Practical Demonstrations

   • Interactive sessions featuring actors portraying couples in conflict scenarios
   • Live problem-solving exercises, Q&A with a live audience

GUEST: DR. SUSAN HEITLER

Susan Heitler PhD is a Denver clinical psychologist and widely-read author. Educated at Harvard and NYU, Dr. Heitler offers self-help information for individuals and for couples. She also writes for therapists, offering new understandings and treatments for anxiety, anger, depression, narcissism, and relationship challenges.

DEPRESSION:

“What triggers depression is feeling powerless and giving up on something you want.” — Dr. Susan Heitler

• Depression is a disorder of power
• There is a continuum of depression from being down or blue to severe dysfunction
• Get help if you or your partner are experiencing severe depression

3 P’S PRESCRIPTION FOR DEALING WITH DEPRESSION:

• Pinpoint. Figure out the trigger. What is the bump in the road?
• Pump up. Take a deep breath. Take a power pose. Imagine yourself getting bigger and taller.
• Problem solve. Think of solutions from a much more empowered position.

HOW COUPLES CAN DEAL WITH DEPRESSION:

• Share concerns
• Listen to concerns
• Aim for win/win solutions